Recently, Madisyn has shown great interest in reading and arts. I normally find her curled up on the couch or in her bedroom somewhere, reading. Other days, constantly creating downstairs at the craft table. This is such as joy to watch her grow her love for both of these.
We've been doing some free art classes at the library. Learning about different artist and their techniques. She normally has no issues with leaving me to do things anymore. She goes to dance class alone, school, swimming and all sorts of activities. These art classes...NOT A CHANCE. So, I stayed with her in the room and just watched and helped another little boy in the room that has severe disabilities.
Later that night, driving home, we talked. I asked her why she didn't want to do this class alone. Her quick response was, it's loud and busy and I am afraid you will forget to come and get me. This made my heart hurt...hurt like never before. Is this coming from being abandoned...in a loud, busy place? Are these feelings of being alone and afraid? Being forgotten? My eyes sting with tears as I write this. I cannot imagine the feeling of uncertainly and anxiety she must feel inside her little body. As I choked back the tears and tried to respond, I said baby girl, I will never forget you, I will never leave you or hurt you. I will always be here, be there whenever you need me. If me going inside the art class with you makes you feel safe, I will go.
As the conversation continued, I reminded her that I will never forget her. she said to me..."Mama, I forget that! I think you will forget!." Oh how my heart aches for her as we help her through this stage and I am sure it will appear other ways and times down the road but the truth is, she is not forgotten but loved. Very Much!
Baby girl, we love you!
No comments:
Post a Comment